Now before you get all upset, work with me here. Imagine for a moment, that you are Nicolas Cage in Con Air. You are out with your significant other only to encounter some ruffians that are up to no good.
And this is where it matters, guys: CAN you defend her? Not do you but can you?
That is what the ladies want. They want to feel protected and taken care of. They want to feel safe.
So if you are too nice of a guy, and she doesn't feel like you can protect her, then you aren't getting anywhere.
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While opinions may differ, please remember to treat others as you would like to be treated.